Sunday, May 4, 2014

The End-The Beginning


It has been  a really long time since I have been on here. Two years to be exact and so many things have changed that you could not even imagine. I just came on the site to read my old diary entries and I had no idea they were that sad, but so many things have happened. I could not be happier that I started this post before I started college, because SURPRISE I'm graduating from college in 2 weeks. College has been the most unforgettable and best experience of my life, because I did find out a lot of things about myself. In relation to my past post, my girl best friend that I was in love with told me she was bi and had done a little of experimenting with girls. She is still with the same boyfriend, but he has the more the merrier policy lol, side worldwind. After Thanksgiving break I have not seen her, but we Skype and call (last time we talked on the phone was 3 days ago) so we are still very close. Unfortunately, I cannot say the same about my gay best friend. We ended up moving in together and lived together for 2 years in an apartment plus over the summer. We told each other that we were in love with each other and talked about how crazy that was because we could never do anything about it. I still loved him and love him, but we haven't talked in over a week eventhough we live together. I couldn't keep dealing with all of our baggage anymore and told him I didn't want to live together. He was done and we don't talk. He was getting closer with a guy he's been hooking up with since freshman year as of a month ago, but I'm not the biggest fan of him or his friends. That's not the real reason we aren't living together, we both know why. New beginnings are scary and my heart is hurt that I've lost my best friend from this roller coaster a month before it ends, but that was his choice. I'll mend it and keep my head high.

Now I will go back to living on the uncomfortable couch and closet until I make my way and get another apartment. I'll come back and post! Can't wait to see what life has in store now.

I've fallen back in love with life.